Emo-whiny-pussy week (Kilala.nl (Cailin Coilleach)) by Cailin Coilleach

From hence forth, the fourth week of a semester shall be known as Emo-whiny-pussy week. In this week I shall partake in much sulking, moping and hiding away, thus ensuring that no homework gets done. And there was much rejoicing. (Yay...)

But seriously, this is a trend I've noticed with myself: the first three weeks of a semester I steam through like a train on nitro. Then, all of a sudden I'm completely out of steam and no work gets done. I also usually feel drowned by the amount of work that's still left. Then, in the fifth week I seem to pick up pace again.

Hooray for self reflection :)

Posted in: college , emo , pussy , study , whiny

Life has its own rhythm: up and down, like a sine wave (Kilala.nl (Cailin Coilleach)) by Cailin Coilleach

Damn. It came back.

There was desperation, there was shouting, there was crying and finally there was consolation. This time I'm doing something about it. No matter what the outcome is.

This has started to affect my professional life, so maybe it's time to have some changes.

Posted in: emo , life , rhythm , sine wave , stress

I don't think I'm doing too good (Kilala.nl (Cailin Coilleach)) by Cailin Coilleach

You know? I don't think I'm doing too hot :[

The past few weeks I've been feeling stressed out, constantly tired, overall mopey and to top it off there's some doubts and confusion. I'm doubting about life, about work, about decisions I've made so far. Thinking about how different things could've been if I'd made a few different choices here and there. Thinking about what-ifs and what-nows in general.

Unfortunately this has had its repercussions on my environment as well: I've been a dick to Marli for the past few weeks (less attentive, more bitchy), I haven't had that much oomph! at the office and I've let my work for Anime 2007 go down the gutter :(

What makes things worse is the nagging voice in the back of my head that's telling me that all of this is nothing and that I should easily be coping with it all. Guilt++.

I've known about these feelings and doubts all along, but I've only realised just now how deep things are getting. While on the phone with my friend Kaj, who's just come back from Japan (glad that your back!), I noticed a tremble in my voice and some moisture cropping up in my eyes... That ain't no good sign as far as I'm concerned.

I think I need to think things over...

Posted in: doubts , emo , meh , stress